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Tuesday, 7 August 2007

London, England (IP) - Yoko Ono was retroactively crowned the Queen of Bad taste in a spectacular ceremony viewed by a world wide pay per view audience.

Anyone who is interested can go to "images" on google and then enter into the search engine the following words exactly : turd in a punch bowl - and the first image on the screen is a visual analogy which most accurately describes her affect on John Lennon's music.

Yoko was interviewed and all of the answers she gave during the interview were extremely honest and quite candid. Here are some excerpts from the interview :

    Q - Yoko, what do you think of your singing on some of those old records and videos you participated in?

    A - I Must confess that I never really listened to myself until recently and as soon as I heard myself I asked, "What is that awful squacking noise on that recording? I almost died when someone politely pointed out that it was me!"

    Q - Yoko, how about you appearance , what is your current opinion on that and how John must have felt about that?

    A - Well we were very high all of the time and John wore glasses as thick as coke bottles so he probably did not have a clue.

    Q - Yoko - what would you tell young people today about your performance back the?

    A - Well, I would tell them I am living proof that anyting (SIC) is possible if you have a little luck and just give it a go.

    Q - Yoko, what was your effect on other musicians surrounding John and how did they behave towards you?

    A - Well, they must have been very polite and tolerant and able to keep a straight face and also must have been very strong to not pull out their hair every time I opened my mouth. I realize now I had absolutely no talent.

The coronation show is under way and luckily viewers have been advised to turn off the sound and not to expose small dogs and children to the audio part of the program.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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