Written by trythisathome
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Wednesday, 25 July 2007

A woman has just opened up a shop in a new (out in the sticks town) . There is a queue at the till.

Shopkeeper Hello Sir how may I help you?

Customer I would like something saucy for my wife please.

Shopkeeper Tomato sir?

Customer No! I want her in something revealing.

Shopkeeper This is a corner shop sir, We do not have a lingerie department I am afraid.

Customer So you cant help then. What kind of place are you running here?!

Man leaves. Next customer

Shopkeeper Hello Madam how may I help?

Customer I would like a bit of polish please.

Shopkeeper Certainly madam. Mr sheen?

Customer No I want a proper polish person please.

Shopkeeper Sorry Madam we don't have an immigrant department here I am afraid.

Customer Not even lurking round the back/ What kind of place are you running here?!

Woman leaves. Next customer.

Shopkeeper Hello Sir how may I help you?

Customer I would like a chicken.

Shopkeeper Certainly Sir, fresh or frozen?

Customer Don't care how she comes as long as I do.

Shopkeeper Sorry Sir you said chicken.

Customer Yes I would like a Chick, PLEASE Hen.

Shopkeeper Sorry sir we do not have a dating or a brothel department here.

Customer What not even out of hours? What kind of place are you running here?!

Man leaves. Next Customer

Shopkeeper Hello Madam. How can I help you?

Customer I would like a Dictaphone please.

Shopkeeper Well Madam I can definitely help you with that. Call this number and you will get the bastard that sold me this hell hole.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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