MALIBU (Calf.) -- Today. For God's sake Paris, put on a L.A. street wear micro mini before we all go Buzz, ding-dong -- Hello. You look like my 5th grade primary school teacher. Pull yourself together girl.
Can someone please organize a petition to GOD, to let Paris Hilton off missionary work. She has already done Hawaiian surf bums and poor people of Malibu beach, who only live in $2 million beach shacks.
Enough is enough. I'm not saying don't wear underwear or get pissed as a rooter skunk, even if you now have a designated driver. Just show a little skin.
The paparazzi were so destitute a few nights ago -- that 48 of them photographed and video taped a little mouse by the kerb -- eating a left over pink taco.
Scared the hell out of the little critter. You don't want to be responsible for cruelty to L.A. rodents, do you?
Get your ass out on the curb Girlfriend!