(The following document was discovered at the headquarters of Halliburton, recently relocated to Saudi Arabia)
Loyal Halliburton Stooges, hear this. It is necessary to maintain the global state of war present currently on the planet. War is good for business, gentlemen, and to attain our goals we have deployed Lord Cheney to the Oval Office to reactivate the mind-control chip implanted in the President.
Once reactivated, Operation Bomb-the-Everloving-Crap-out-of-Iran can begin. Imagine the profits of blowing up all of those pesky Iranians who stole our oil under the pretense of "having lived there since the beginning of civilization." We all know how weak this argument is, but apparently they need some convincing.
Rise now and go forth, my minions, and with war we shall finally triumph over the forces of democracy and make the world clean for our kind. Imagine the cocktail parties we shall have! In Nominum Tyrannus!
- Your Corporate Overlord,
Karl Rove, a.k.a.,