Written by Ace Ventura
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Sunday, 20 May 2007

The popular game series from Rockstar, GTA as he players refer to it has become hugely succesful from GTA1 to GTA Vice City Stories. As many know the GTA games are based on real places Vice City/Miami, San Andreas/San Francisco/Hollywood/Las Vegas, Liberty City/New York and much more but what one gamer James "Angst" Focknut Murphy shouted as he threw his Playstation 2 out the window along with his 60 inch Sony Bravia Television

"WHAT THE F*CK WHO'S VICK VANCE BASED ON SON OF A BITCH DIES IN VICE CITY ANYWAY F*CK!" how do I know this you ask it's pretty hard not to hear someone who made people within a two metre radius temporarily deaf, thankfully I was wearing cotton buds in my ears to tune out my wife's Micha Barton's self-centred views but I was fortunate to catch the TV in my arms.After speaking with Rockstar's head designer for the GTA games Vack Vince who has had his name changed several times those including Temmy Vorcity, Tonnie Cippycupbriani, Candice Jockson are just the few of them. He started talking to me about his plans for the next game

"Recently we've been taking maps from past games and modifying them and making new stories to clash with the originals Vick Vance for instance was killed in the beggining of Grand Theft Auto Vice City which incidentallly was teh first GTA game with bikes that Grand Theft Auto Vice City purchase it from any of your gaming outlets i.e. Sears."

"Mr. Vince! If you want to advertise on my article I want eighty percent of teh cut!"

"Never!"

"Now Mr. Vince who will be the main character of San Andreas Stories."

"In teh original San Andreas Candice Jockson oh I mean CJ heard teh voice of his dead brother Brian Jackson in SAS you'll start off in San Fierro where Brian was supposedly killed but you live on with no recollection of your memories or family teh storyline if that you're on a quest to find out everything and you work with a buddy in beggining we're thinking of making it Smoke's brother and like in every GTA game you kill him in the end you return to Los Santos where CJ is now married and has a son named after you and you discover your sister is humping a mexican sleazeball so a not so happy ending."

"In soem of teh GTA games you drop hints of relationships will tehre be a real one in thsi game?"

"Oh yes we're thinking of putting this really hot white girl big bazookas y'know!"

"Yes....(Pencil Scracthing) when can we expect this to be out?"

"Next year now I must warn gamers this GTA games have graphics that seem liek real life and there's nudity lots and lots of nudity girls in particular and we have three sex scenes so brace yourselves."

NOTE: BUY GTASAS AND FIND NAUGHTY EASTER EGG! And pick up Mischa's anti-selfcentre pills

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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