Ok, I admit this in writing, anonymously, for now I fear for my life. I wire tapped Trump Tower.
President Trump blames Obama, but I have never met President Obama and in all honesty, although it would make a great story, President Obama had nothing to do with it.
Actually, it was Hillary Clinton, well not directly, but it was Hillary's team who directed the wiretap.
I should be more clear, I'm not even sure Hillary Clinton knew about it, her team was being so cautious, never anything in writing. The request actually came through some guy named Carter Page, through secret meetings, who said he worked for Hillary.
With a name like Carter I sure believed him.
When I talked to him, he said "in like Flynn" a lot, and seemed to have an affinity for raw fish, red clothes and cold weather. He kept saying, "put in" this and "put in" that, trying to direct me, but I didn't know what he meant. Strange dude, really.
So it's Hillary's fault, blame her, she lost anyway, Hillary, with all her state department connections, wire tapped Trump Tower.
I am sorry for my participation. I swear I didn't hear much, although I can report that Melania doesn't think much of her husband, but that's it, oh, and Donald Trump only brushes his teeth once a day.
And that whole golden shower thing is only partly true, the showers there are made of gold, that's all, the rest is just an exaggeration of mine that got out of hand.