Written by Jeff Brone
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Saturday, 1 July 2017

I'm an artist and being an artist, I realize that I'm more sensitive than others. Not that makes me better, just more sensitive. And better. We're also more intuitive. Just the other day, I knew it was going to be a rainy day even before I saw any weather forecasts, for I could feel the foreboding, the darkness, a sense of sadness. Also, it had started to rain. But I wouldn't have even needed that. I knew in my heart of hearts.

And as my heart can predict the weather, I feel a pain in my heart when I see a President who walks into a press room, who sits down with heads of state, and who is a bit overweight. Mr. President, you are a little overweight! I said it. I know what you're thinking: "Jeff, you are so brave to say this." Well damn it, someone has to! I will always speak out against injustice, unfairness, and being slightly overweight.

I will admit, I have had my dark moments. Moments when I almost gave into the darkness, enveloping me like a dark thing that envelops. I thought about mailing Weight Watchers pamphlets to 1600 Pennsylvania Ave but didn't know the zip code - the zip code of truth! It was then I thought "love." We must win with love, for love "trumps" weight. And to those who say we can't win, we should go home, we probably left the water running or something, I say "Go Fish!" We will win, together, or just me, however it works out.

We will win, for we "trump" defeat, and better health through weight loss will prevail. You cannot beat us, President Trump, you weighing somewhat more than you should, probably, I'm not a doctor so I'm only estimating. You cannot beat us, for only we will beat us. Only we. Will beat us, I mean.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

71 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more