Written by Nottobie Trusted
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Wednesday, 25 January 2017

We all want to be popular. Unfortunately, we don't all have the face of popularity. Likability, now that's something we can all achieve. And with these four easy steps to follow, you'll be likable in no time!

1. Have a sense of humor. If you don't have one, immediately after saying something, stare at the listener (preferably a stranger) in the eyes and say in a low voice, "You're supposed to be laughing." The listener will be intimidated and do what you ordered.

2. Compliment someone if they're having a bad day. If they look like they're having a good day, insult them to help tone that down.

3. Be active on social media with people you want to like you. Interesting posts will make them look forward to the next one. Tweeting, "I GOTTA PEE!" every couple hours is bound to have those people unfollow you. And probably block you as well, for good measure.

4. Wear an outfit that screams 'you', such as a shirt advertising your favorite band to listen to and not a dress completely made of Howlers that literally scream 'you' on a repeat.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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