Written by Jaggedone
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Thursday, 4 February 2016

image for Matt Le Blanc new Top Gear presenter promises a stiffer For blonde ladies! This is not Matt Le Blanc by the way!

Jaggedone's special news "Flash" for the ladies!

BBC HQ London! 04.02.2016

Matt Le Blanc will be taking over macho males fav TV programme, Top Gear! Matt has promised to wow his female followers by sitting naked in an open top E Type Jaguar!! The programme will be renamed "Women's Own Top Gear" and gaga females all over the planet have offered to stroke his gear stick as much as he desires!

Macho male Top Gear followers shocked at the news can now watch ex-Top Gear presenter, Jeremy Clarkson, playing Matt's role in Friends and the latest series will be renamed "Enemies" as Clarkson has promised to "punch the lights out of anybody" daring to say "boo" to him!

Mogadishu, 04.02.2016

As exclusively reported here 2 days ago the Daallo Airline plane that landed at Mogadishu airport with a hole in it had no passengers on board! The airline are proud to have done a great job as Int. airline authorities confirmed the fact!

ISIL representatives were so pleased with the confirmation they have increased their purchase from a 100 "holy" planes to 200 and an ISIL spokesman told our special reporter CIA, Abdul Bin-NotinLaden (to German = I am not in zee shop) the following:

"Vat Hitler can do ve can do 10 times better!"

Note of caution for suicidal backpackers or other maniacs travelling in Syria, Iraq or Eastern Turkey;

Beware of falling dead bodies, they could kill!

Image: And we thought we'd seen it all!

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

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