Written by SlapJabPost
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Wednesday, 13 January 2016

I cannot tell you how uplifting Francesca Gino's recent article in Scientific American magazine made me feel.

All my life I have been harassed, whether it be by my parents or close friends, as having a terribly sarcastic attitude towards life and all the assholes I have to share it with. Then, finally, I find an article from who the hell knows whom, which justifies my entire reason for being.

I am superior. I am more thoughtful, insightful, and intellectual than my fellow human beings. Hell, my sarcasm even proves that I will even put more effort into a relationship than the ungrateful b**** I am in it with.

So lay off the snide little remarks about me that you don't think I can hear (my hearing is likely superior too). In actuality, I can't take any no more credit for my gifts then Bill Cosby can for his pension to drug young women.

So carry on through your boring little days. Trump is in the news so that should cheer you up.

Just know that I am here ready to cast my light where it is dark, to carry the needed torch which shows you the better way.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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