Written by Dick Sheerer
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this
Tags: camping, life

Friday, 31 July 2015

image for The Case Against Recreation - Part 23: Camping A Wimp Roughing It

Camping- Camping trips are yet another example of the fixation humans has with animal behavior. Despite advanced creature comforts and housing with all the conveniences of modern living, people are still drawn to the harsh elements of the great outdoors. It's a mindless ingrained habit that defies all logic except if it's like a salmon swimming against the current to reach the spawning ground upstream.

It's the call of nature and resistance is futile. In the evolutionary transition from animal to man some people, campers in particular, failed to make the full adjustment. They have an uncontrollable need to run around naked in the woods and mate with whomever they choose, with or without their consent. Camping provides an ideal environment for this raw savage urge to be realized-unless a forest ranger is on patrol in the vicinity.

Camping has no benefit to society whatsoever, only a problem and a nuisance. Campers are a major cause of the homelessness crisis because camping is a form of homelessness. They proactively promote it like an uncivilized breed of subhuman degenerates that belong in a zoo. The main thing that campers do is start wildfires that destroy forests then spread to residential neighborhoods and burn down homes, killing hundreds of people.

Although hunters would have a field day, it is unwise to declare open season on campers because their rotting carcasses would litter the land with pathogens from the decomposing flesh spreading deadly diseases in a global pandemic, the likes of which has not been seen since the great plague.

Hiking- People who like walking allot glorify the activity with the special name, hiking. The term comes from the root words "high" and "king", and is used to build hikers' self esteem. Hikers are usually country folk or inbred hillbillies with little or no formal education, so thinking of themselves as high kings gives them a sense of worth to compensate for the pathetic feeling of being their true halfwit imbecile selves. A few well-educated affluent people, even some royal family members, also like to hike. Their motivation springs from the desire to fully experience the life of a halfwit imbecile.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

74 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more