Written by Gee Pee
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Wednesday, 1 October 2014

image for Exhibit or Exhibitionism? No nudes is good nudes, Houston citizens believe

HOUSTON, WE HAVE A PROBLEM, TEXASS - The citizens of Houston, TX, have a problem with Jorge Marin's statues. They're male--and they're naked.

"Whether they be flesh and blood or bronze, we don't cotton to no naked men here in Houston, partner," Jim ("Big Bear") Butt said.

The brawny bronzes in the sculptor's Wings of the City collection have stirred more than a few Houstonites, as residents of Houston like to call themselves, "to righteous indignation," Butt admitted, "if not to downright anger."

His wife Ima agrees. "We're aroused," she said, "mighty aroused!"

The exhibit is on display in Derr E. Aire Park.

"A lot of kids come here," Goldie Bottoms whined, "and the last thing they need to see is this pornography!"

Not everyone was offended by the exhibition, however. Gay Blade said, "What's the beef? They're flaccid."

"The statues are not well endowed," Bob Ng-Head observed. "I mean, frankly, I've seen bigger weenies in a can of beans and franks."

A famous visitor from Wacky Waco, former president George W. Bush, said he thought the statues are "cute." His wife, he gushed, says they remind her of him, before he's taken his Viagra.

"Besides, they're not even anatomically correct," Bunny Bunn complained. "These statues are of middle-aged figures, but they have tight abs and tight buns, unlike those of any real man who's older than twenty five."

The statues are on display "until further notice," for anyone who has never seen such erections, the Houston Committee for Offensive Arts declared. "We encourage voyeurs--I mean, visitors--to take in the exhibitionism--I mean exhibit."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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