Written by Al N.
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Saturday, 19 July 2014

image for Scamatology Leader's Missing Wife Shows Up and Beats the Living Xenu Out of Him Disfigured Davy after the fight with super-powered Shelly

The leader of Scamatology, diminutive Davy Makemerich, has been dodging questions for years about his missing wife, Smelly. At the same time that this drama has been going on, Wee Davy has been collecting money from Scamatologists for the Super Power building, which he says will give worthy cult members various super-powers--including the ability to find parking places INSTANTLY.

When Davy opened the building, after raising about 10 times the cost of the building, it was rumored Smelly's remains would be found inside one of the locked rooms of the Super Power Building.

Imagine Davy's surprise when Smelly (who Davy had apparently been trying to keep imprisoned) emerged after years of being missing with SUPER POWERS!!

In spite of the fact that she found a parking spot within seconds of coming to the cult leader's sumptious quarters, he suspected nothing. All of a sudden, a hidden key was used to unlock Davy's secret hideout.

Davy, upon seeing Smelly and realizing she had somehow acquired super powers, started crying and screamed, "Please don't hurt me!"

The diminutive dictator of Scamatology, who often beats up his staff, learned what an ass beating was really like. Apparently, there was so much swelling from Little Davy's wounds that he wasn't recognized at first until he started ordering people around. It was a true ass-kicking for Makemerich, who had kept his wife imprisoned for years.

Smelly was last seen heading for the mountains with a vague clue of where she was going--she was shouting, "Free Xenu!!"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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