Written by Auntie Jean

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Friday, 25 April 2014

image for So Easy Even a Man Can Do It - Parking Guide

Husbands - forget embarrassing parallel parking mess - ups, getting into trouble in the supermarket car park, scuffing your wife's expensive alloy wheels and banging the car door onto the next one while struggling to squeeze your beer gut out of the driver's door. Here's our confidence boosting parking advice:

1) Get touch up paint to keep in your "Man Bag".

2) Superglue giant cats whiskers to strategic points around the car so that you can see them move when you scrape something.

3) Carry a dozen assorted touch up sprays including alloy wheel colour so that when your wife washes the car on Sunday morning you can claim the mark was there sll the time and someone else, for instance the garage mechanic did it while carrying out a service.

4) Park where there is a huge space and take a taxi to where you want to go.

5) Shunt the cars in front and behind out of the way, this is surprisingly easy to do with practice.

6) If things go badly wrong go straight into indignant denial mode and refuse sex until the accusations stop.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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