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Sunday, 29 December 2013

image for New Year's Eve TV Guide TV: What better thing could you do on New Year's Eve?

Here is a listing of Channel 6's schedule for New Year's Eve.

7.00pm. The Greatest Adverts of 2013. Stephen Telly counts down the nation's favourite 50 adverts of the year. Sponsored by Wonga.

9.00pm. Medieval Fantasy Bloodbath. The Count visits a brothel, Sir Nipple has his leg cut off by a dwarf, and Princess Stacey discovers a secret that forces her to boil her husband alive.

10.00pm. My Life As A Hamster. Comedian Timothy Munt lives as a hamster for a week. We follow his progress as he has an exercise wheel fitted in his living room and a giant water bottle attached to the side of his house. Warning: viewers who are allergic to sawdust are advised not to watch.

10.30pm. Ifs Not Buts. The grammar-based panel show returns for special New Year edition. Host Robin Humphries will be judging the ability of celebrity guests to use the English language correctly. Guest stars include UKIP MP Humphrey Bogarov and Page 3 girl Hannah Tits.

11.00pm. Julian Belgium's New Year Piss-up. To bring in the New Year with a song and a dance, the irrepressible pianist will be persuading guest musicians to jam with him while trying to create a jovial atmosphere among the studio audience of hired extras.

01.00am. Film: The End Of The World. (2013) British romantic comedy about an ancient Aztec curse which could cause the end of the world to happen in the early hours of January the 1st 2014. Starring Hugh Chuff as a polite English scientist and Scarlett Crimson as a disobedient witch determined to party hard before the world ends. Will the pair be able to resolve their differences and sober up enough to save the planet?

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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