NEW YORK CITY - Justin Bieber flew into New York City for an appearance on The Viagra View with Larry King and Regis Philbin.
The Biebs told the elder talk show hosts that he wanted to give them a scoop.
Both men sat up in their chairs. Justin then told them that he was officially announcing that he was retiring from the music business.
No?" asked Philbin.
"Yes" Bieber replied
"You're kiddin' us aren't you?" King asked.
"No, I ain't kiddin' I have just realized that I'm 19-years-old and I have got to sit down and figure out what I want to do with my life."
"What?" King yelled out. "Sonny boy, music is your life. It's your career. Regis and I are talk show hosts. President Obama is a politician, Gary Busey is a space cadet. And Justin Bieber is a singer."
"Gary Busey's a space cadet?" Bieber asked.
Regis replied that he's not really an astronaut or anything like that, it's just that a space cadet is someone who's kind of spacey.
"Like Sarah Palin?" Justin asked.
"Exactly!" Came the reply in unison from Regis and Larry.
Larry asked him when the retirement takes place. Bieber replied that he'll retire before the year is over.
Regis grinned. He then said, "You know Beaver, many people think that you're just a dumb, little Canadian kid who doesn't know squat about squat. But I'm here to say that Justin Beaver is dumb like a fox."
"Ah Mr. Philbin, my last name is Bieber, B-i-e-b-e-r and not Beaver B-e-a-v-e-r."
"But really Justin, I am willing to bet any amount of money that this retirement business is simply a ploy to, one, get the kids to go out and buy as many of your albums as they can and, two, it won't be long before you get before the microphones again and tell the country and the world that you are planning the Justin Bieber Comes Out of Retirement Tour."
"Dammit, you're good Mr. Philbin."