Written by Auntie Jean
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Tags: testicles

Tuesday, 17 December 2013

image for Testicles sliced off on water park ride Loose glass on slide

Auntie Jean advises D. Void O'Nuts.

"Auntie Jean, my nuts were sliced off by a broken piece of glass fibre on a Water Park slide this morning. The lifeguard retrieved them for me and packed them into a medium fizzy orange carton with ice. I have a day off next week and wondered whether to freeze them until then, when I can get to the casualty department. I know to keep them away from the dog and to keep them on ice, have you any recommendations please?"

Auntie Jean Advises:

Hi, Ms.D. Void. You must cut a pouch in each thigh muscle and place one testicle in each. If they are still frozen you can microwave them for a few minutes. Seal the testicles into their respective pouches, left or right with sterilised needle and thread and they will remain healthy for several years.

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