Written by Al N.
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Thursday, 5 December 2013

image for Tom Cruise and John Travolta Save Pasadena Cruise and Travolta combine OT powers to eliminate Pasadena disaster in time for the Rose Bowl

Famed Scientologists Tom Cruise and John Travolta today used their combined "OT" powers to save the city of Pasadena from a 7 point earthquake.

"We were always warned by the head Scientologists not to let outsiders see our powers but we felt we had to do something to save Pasadena," said Cruise.

"Yes, we would never have revealed our powers if it had been just Glendale," said Travolta.

The two Scientologist super-heroes combined their OT powers to create an explosion that countered the effects of the earthquake.

Mr. Cruise was quoted as saying, "We know, as Scientologists, that with great power comes great responsibility and that when you're a Scientologist, sometimes you know that you are the only one who can do something."

In related Scientology news, Kirstie Alley single-handedly pummeled a group of 60 protesters wearing Anonymous masks. "I warned them not to say anything about my religion," bellowed the bellicose Alley. "But then they went way over the line when they said Shelley Long was funnier than me."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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