Written by walter
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Sunday, 7 April 2013

We are familiar with the big bang theory, cosmological model depicting the expansion of the universe: from a hot state into present status. The big bang theory can tell us what has happened ever since that time, but it cannot explain the initial condition of, say empty universe, prior to the bang. Neither can I.

Nevertheless, my theory is very straight forward. It is based on spinning tops that we used to play with as kids. Don't BS me with causality mish mash! I would like to imagine that one day the space was empty. Next day some cloudlike stuff gathered and gradually turned into a tornadoes or a whirlwind. It kept spinning and spinning until it became denser and denser and smaller and smaller. A form of precipitation was formed on the surface of the spinning top. These tiny drops, like a wet dog shaking, were separated by a centrifugal force and thrown out into the universe, still turning round and round. Each drop split into, say, several smaller drops, solar system, all keeping their initial ties or gravity with their immediate parental drop. This went on until the spinning top was completely exhausted, every drop forcefully shot into the space.

Of course, each cast off drop proportionally contained the same powers and properties of every thing comprising the first cloud. Each drop harbored all the powers and properties together with all the causes that produced them, including all dormant powers, such as earthquakes, tsunamis, hurricanes, tornadoes, floods, life, budding, and particularly death.

Some drops, like planet earth, gradually cooled off and gave way to the life phenomenon. Let's briefly explore the life of calcium and oxygen. The atomic number of calcium is 20, having 2 electrons in excess. Oxygen's atomic number, 8, wanting 2 electrons. Now, calcium, like a buffalo hunter, goes to the charming oxygen, with two buffalo skins on his shoulder, kneeling, offers the skins, or rather the electrons, and proposes, "Will you marry me?" O consents and allows Ca to hold her tight thus forming a partnership, CaO. That's it.

Neither of them needed permission from a court of law and a jackass standing next to them, hee-hawing. Naturally, there was a bond between them, the transfer of electrons, carried in their properties when their drop was cast away from the spinning top. When the new couple, CaO, drank some water, they formed calcium hydroxide. This new entity, from that point on, continued a new life in mortars, plasters, and cements etc. In other words, they continue their immortal life as prescribed by natural powers and properties bestowed upon them at the first turn.

However, when it comes to man vs. the entire planet earth, he must suffer a lot at the hands of some imposters who have falsified reality through their poisonous fantasies, claiming they have been sent by a whatchamacallit ! Their teaching has resulted with nothing but superficial attitudes toward life and has distorted man's view of reality, a teaching that has offered man nothing but phony concepts and fake expectation from a dilapidated lackluster heaven, dating back to 13.798 billion years ago.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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