Written by CaptainSausage
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Tags: Hitler, ww2

Saturday, 1 December 2012

image for Secret files reveals WW2 plans to invade Hitler Hitler didn't like it up him

An exclusive Channel 7 documentary will this week reveal amazing secret plans from World War Two. During the conflict, Britain drew up a strategy for the invasion of Adolf Hitler, which unfortunately never came to fruition.

Churchill was a firm advocate of the plans, which he believed would provide a suitable revenge for the devastation of Europe wrought by the evil German dictator. However, US President Roosevelt advised Churchill that it would be better to attack the German troops who were fighting on the front, and then to deal with Hitler later.

The British wartime leader agreed, and the plans were not followed. However, Churchill ordered that they be completed and kept ready so that they could be used in case the opportunity arose. As a result they were incredibly detailed.

It was known that Hitler was very heavily fortified, particularly in his vulnerable areas. The plans noted that Hitler had no natural harbours. Therefore a series of artifical concrete harbours would be constructed, from which a beach-head could be established. These "inflatable Jeremys" as they were called were never built, but would have allowed troops, artillery and tanks to easily disembark into Hitler.

The first day of the attack would have been perilous. It was estimated that many men could be lost as they attempted to establish a foothold. Paratroopers would also have been used to try to land behind his fortifications.

Once the inflatable Jeremys could be towed into position and a perimeter was secured, then men from the army and navy could begin entering Hitler in their hundreds. They would have faced many dangers at enemy hands, including the psychological trauma of being involved in the assault, as well as chafing.

It was thought that Hitler would have been very shocked to have been invaded by Allied forces, and that he would likely have surrendered fairly quickly. However, in the event that he did not capitulate, there were plans to set off a series of bombs inside him, detonating them from a safe distance. This would be combined with an aerial bombardment, and would have ensured that Hitler never bothered anyone ever again.

The Plan To Invade Hitler will be shown on Channel 7 tonight at 19:45.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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