Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Tuesday, 6 November 2012

POLITICAL FACEBOOK

President Obama: Good morning Chris. And how is my new BFF?
8:01 a.m.

Governor Christie: Just fine Mr. President. How are things at the White House?
8:04 a.m.

President Obama: I'm not at the White House right now. Michelle and I drove down to a local Flat As A Pancake Pancake House for some breakfast.
8:07 a.m.

Governor Christie: I ate earlier, but I'm still kinda hungry so I may just go out and get me about half a dozen Egg McMuffins from Mickey D's.
8:12 a.m.

President Obama: Is your wife going with you?
8:15 a.m.

Governor Christie: No sir.
8:19 a.m.

President Obama: How about your aide?
8:21 a.m.

Governor Christie: No sir. She's got a lot of important phone calls to return on my behalf.
8:24 a.m.

President Obama: So who's gonna help you eat the half dozen Egg McMuffins Chris?
8:29 a.m.

Governor Christie: Ah...well...I guess that would be me, myself, and I, Mr. President.
8:34 a.m.

President Obama: Whew! That's a lot of carbs pal.
8:37 a.m.

Governor Christie: Mr. President, not to change the subject or anything - but have you and the little lady voted yet?
8:43 a.m.

President Obama: No, but as soon as we finish our breakfast, we are heading over to Paul Revere High School where we will both be casting our votes.
8:49 a.m.

Governor Christie: And who are you both voting for? [GIGGLING].
8:53 a.m.

President Obama: Well, I hate to sound conceited, but Michelle and I are voting for the best choice on the ballot...that be me.
8:59 a.m.

Governor Christie: Say Mr. President, can you keep a secret?
9:03 a.m.

President Obama: Is Ann Coulter as ugly as seaweed?
9:06 a.m.

Governor Christie: Hell yes, the woman is a walking clump of bacteria
9:13 a.m.

President Obama: That's a good one Chris! That's a damn good one!
9:17 a.m.

Governor Christie: To answer your question Mr. President. I am voting for you sir. You came to New Jersey and you told me that you will do everything humanly possible to get New Jersey back on its feet after we got hit by Hurricane Sandy. That arrogant, draft-dodging, Big Bird-looking Romney only sent me a text message saying, "Damn that was a lot of rain and wind huh Chris?"
9:21 a.m.

Mitt Romney: Hey Christie, read my lips - sticks and stones...
9:26 a.m.

Governor Christie: Hey Frankenstein, read my lips...#^@$%*&#%!
9:29 a.m.

President Obama: Atta boy Chris. You got him good amigo.
9:32 a.m.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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