Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Thursday, 27 September 2012

I had to work all day today and, aside from making some money that my spawn will end up spending, nothing good came of it, all that work I mean.

Does this happen to anybody else or am I alone in thinking that the people making money off of me owe me a little bit more than money?

It would be a welcome change if the woman who is my boss would give me a blow job along with my pay check. She won't because, says she, I am "the kind of guy who would sue (her) for sexual harassment." I would not; I would only threaten to. And before a bunch of you get your knickers in knots about me using the threat of sexual harassment in an effort to make a joke, stop reading here and go fuck yourself, because it gets worse.

I am considering changing my vocation. Recently, I took a Strong Vocational Interest Test that, once scored helps you make solid decisions about your likely success in different vocations. Mine told me I was a whore, so I believe I shall become a male prostitute. On second thought, that would not be my best career move so late in life. I would not make the money I make now, and my new boss still wouldn't blow me. I'd be a destitute, male prostitute.

For me, that would be just a lateral move, and not a step up in the world.

But I think it might just help me to get laid to tell women that other women pay me for my sexual acumen. And let's face it; you women listen only to women. Each week you women spend a gazillion dollars buying books, diet plans, shoes, bras, lubricants, and sex toys because other women have told you that you should.

So, if another woman told you that she paid me to have sex with her, well, you'd come to me and throw money at me so that I would so that I would screw you.

At least once, anyway.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!
Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

52 readers are online right now!

Go to top