Written by Inchcock

Print this

Monday, 3 September 2012

image for My Senior Moments for W/E: 2nd September 2012 Sunday: A desiree potato before it has been in the oven for eleven hours

Monday 27th August 2012:

* Up early, medications (all bar water tablets) then did the Spoof diaries for the day. During which I only required four visits to the WC... getting easier now.

* Wash, shave sh__, teggies tended to.

* Went over to see Stewart, but he was not in, I'd forgot it was Monday, his day at the social centre. (I know... your amazed that I should forget anything)

* Set out for walk to Bulwell. A lot of shops closed when i got there, but I did manage to get some cheap Alliums, tin of ham, and pickled cucumber.

Tuesday 28th August 2012:

* Up and on the laptop early to do diaries before starting out on me medicinal appointments.

* Found three happy birthday greetings for me on facebook. One from me mate Trevor in Dorset, and two from cyber-friends... marvellous!

* Went to make a cuppa, and tried the kettle before using the saucepan just in hopes that it had rectified its own fault and started working again... it did!

* Thinking things were looking up now, I tried the digital radio to see if that had mended itself too... but dropped it on the floor while trying to tune it - had a little memorial service for it as I threw it in the bin.

* Carbolicalised meself, shaved, teggies done, polished me head and clean togs on, and off to the surgery to see the GP and nurse. (0740hrs & 0750hr appointments)

* The sexy, desirable, pretty, attractive, movement inspiring doctor also wished me a happy birthday. Appointment made for a camera to be put down me throat into tummy arranged, awaiting the date to come back to us. Some tablets dosages changed. Prescriptions for Aludrox and Omeprazole given. I left the picture of pulcritude's surgery, and was greeted by the nurse awaiting to take me blood.

* All done too early for me to go to the shop and chemists, so I came back to the hovel, made a cuppa, and updated this Senior Moments tripe.

* Set off out to chemist to get prescriptions filled, and Lidl to get me bread, be overcharged and sneered at.

* A sad picture of the birthday-boy can be seen on this blog: Diary of Woe - August 2012 on this dates entry.

* Changed me mind, and hobbled into the City Centre, paying no heed to the scantily clad young females all around me as I arrived at the Broad Marsh centre 99p shop. I purchased some bickies for medical staff's break-time, some croissants for Margaret, a cheap comedy DVD for Stewart, and two cans for 99p fresh-air spray. I managed not to walk into anything as I passed the scantily clad young females on me walk to the slab square, where I took some photo's of the Nottingham fair and beach.

* Bus to QMC - in and out in 15 minutes.

* Caught the bus to Carrington, went into Lidl to get me bread, expensive birthday treat goulash, and mineral water - I was not overcharged, but the usual sneer was offered by the bloke at the check-out. You could tell he was a well trained professional by the way, when I asked him if he wanted the odd 26p to save his change he muttered: "Don't worry abart it yoof!" So I didn't.

* As I walked by the building site, I noticed a new sign on the temporary fencing: "It is an offence to..." the end bit had been snapped off by some offenders.

Wednesday 29th August 2012:

* Up, medicated, abluted, and on the laptop doing diaries at 0530hrs.

* Pete emailed me, would I fancy a bus ride into Mansfield - so I agreed, and walked to town bus station to meet him, and off to Mansfield.
* Pottered about a bit in the heavy rain, and Pete got his shopping in, then we got but bus back to Nottingham.

* Where I turned off the oven I'd left on.

* 40 visits or so to the WC later, I watched a video... well nearly, but I fell asleep, woke up to go to the WC - rewound the DVD... went to the WC, then gave up and tried to get some sleep proper.

Thursday 30th August 2012:

* Not a blinkin' wink of sleep last night - pains in chest.

* Did the diaries, abluted, changed into togs, and called over the road to see Stewart and Margaret.

* I put the luggage box onto Stew's mobility scooter, but that made it too long to get it back into his shed/garage.

* Margaret arrived, and suggested we try to tie a backpack bag to the rear of the seat - brilliant idea! I managed to get it fixed nice and solid, and Magaret stored the topbox away in case needed later. She's good!

* The padlock on the shed had broken, luckily I had one at home with two keys, and we used that to secure it.

* The wind from both ends was embarrassing today...

Friday 31st August 2012:

* With no sleep the night before last, I put on a Heartbeat DVD to watch, about 1830hrs last night - and woke up this morning at 0530hrs - distorted, aching, and with the broken headhones dangling around my neck and stomach. Oh dear...

* Got on with the diaries, medications taken, and a few cups of tea.

Saturday 1st September 2012:

* Did diaries for the Spoof about 0130hrs I think. The visits to the WC reduced a bit, but I'm going to cut me water tablets to half of one today.

* Went over to see Stew and Margaret. Took some baked potatoes and vegetables for Margaret, bickies for Stew. Stew wanted some DVD's if I could get them - Patriot Games, Blue Steel, and Cape Fear. So had a walk to town and back = managed to get two of the DVD's for Stew. Got some cheap mineral water and tomatoes on the way back, because I can't find the tomatoes I bought yesterday from Asda?

* Got in and did the diaries, getting a bottle of water out of fridge, I dropped it and it burst open, I hope the iron it covered will dry out later.

Sunday 2nd September 2012:

* Good nights kip - got up to go to the WC around 0500hrs - and turned off the oven and removed the potatoes that had spent around 11 hours being roasted.

* Went over to see Stewart and Margaret, both doing well.

* Had a walk to Asda to get some of their soily-cheap-potatoes... but they only had one bag left on sale, so I got it.

* Got back to the hovel and put some tatties on the boil, and threw away the burnt roasted ones from earlier.

* On the laptop and Spoof.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!
Print this


Go to top