Written by CaptainSausage
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Tags: Guns, weapons

Sunday, 26 August 2012

image for The US town with the most weapons The school bus in Bullitt, Arizona

The town of Bullitt, Arizona has the dubious position of being the place with more weapons per person than anywhere else in the USA. The USA is itself the country with the most heavily armed citizenry in the world.

So what is everyday life like in Bullitt? TheSpoof investigated. The first thing you notice upon arriving in the town is that the roads are very wide, as most people drive around in tanks or Humvees. Supermarket aisles have been widened so that people can drive around the stores without leaving their vehicle. The local shopping mall looks like a war zone - but still boasts a lower murder rate than anywhere else in the state.

The cinema was recently torn down and replaced with a drive-in. As well as watching films in their armoured vehicles, most people also sleep in them and talk to each other by phone or internet voice chat.

Some local restaurants have also been adapted to seat tanks, but most have simply converted to drive-throughs.

The local mayor, Ernie Milk, says that the town's citizens are simply exercising their democratic rights. A new town law states that thermonuclear hand devices will be permitted to be carried, concealed or not.

He points to the fact that there have not been any deliberate murders in the town for at least 6 months, although there have been a few accidental killings from tank guns going off without warning.

"Yep!" he said from within his one-man submarine as he went for a paddle in the local swimming pool. "This is the safest town in the world."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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