Written by Inchcock

Print this

Sunday, 1 April 2012

image for My Senior Moments - W/E Sunday 1st April 2012 No longer able to feed these! Sad!

Monday 26th March:
* Up early as usual, encourage to be so by the chest pains, I got a cuppa then went on laptop to the Spoof, then made a humorous graphic, posting link to the Spoof forum. Pleased with myself, I paid a visit to the WC... to find I'd left the heater on all night once again!

Monday 26th March:
* Walked into the city to getbird seed. Got the bus home, got in... and wondered who it would be find my birdseed on the seat of the bus.
* Swore!

Tuesday 27th March:
* Walked to town to get bus out to Morrison's, where I hope to meet Brother-in-law for a lift back home.

Wednesday 28th March:
* A first time clanger & Senior Moment for me this morning! I went out to feed the pigeons (resisting talking to them), and noticed I was getting funny looks from passers by... I came back in when I realised I'd still got me jammies and dressing on!
* When going on laptop, found battery was charging, but only 26% available - how did it get so low?

Thursday 29th March:
* Deputation of neighbours approached and reprimanded me for feeding the pigeons - apparently it is against the law! And I have to stop. Sad.. ah well, so be it.
* Cautiously had a walk to the Arboretum (where I was mugged last year). Found it just as filthy as last time, a little more graffiti on the gates, but on the bright side, more nubile young female students laying on the grass!

Friday 30th March:
* Damned knees are painful this morning!
* Got things ready for later visit to QMC for tests - then got out special offer Pork Farms pork pie that I'd bought yesterday for disabled mate across the road from fridge. Went up to utilise the WC - got back down, and can I find the pie? Can I 'eck as like! (0700hrs)
* Hobbled off to QMC - Got seen to early at Cardiac, who had cancelled the Angiography test, but did the ECG. So no staying in for me this time! Then went to Dermatology, who said the tablets seemed to be lessening the effect of the unknown cause of the welts, and signed me off their books.
* When I got home, I found the pork pie in the fridge - I'd put it in a bag and replaced it back in fridge.

Saturday 31st March:
* Damned knees are painful again this morning!
* Did some Spoofing. Went over to see mate Stewart and his sexy, beautiful, shapely, tender, caring, attractive, movement activating carer Margaret.
* Returned home, and salvaged what I could from the pan of stew I'd left on the stove.

Sunday 1st April:
* Damned knees are painful again this morning!
* Up early again (0335hrs) visited the WC. Then took medications, then visited the WC. Did another failed search for me hearing aid de-coker kit.
* Visited the WC. Made a cuppa, started on Spoofing, heard a noise from somewhere... searched around found nothing looking out of place, checked upstairs... the wardrobe door had fell off. (MFI bought and erected in 1989)
* Visited the WC.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


59 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more