Written by Michael Balton
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Sunday, 18 March 2012

image for Hitler or Bloomberg? Take the Fascism's in Fashion Quiz Mayor Mike scored 6 out of 6.

Here are six unidentified quotes uttered by either New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg or German dictator Adolf Hitler. Test your knowledge of the world's fastest growing political scheme by correctly identifying who said what.

1."'I have my own army... which is the seventh largest army in the world."
Answer: No, this wasn't a boast by Hitler about his SS storm troopers. It's Mayor Mike warning that before anyone gets to him, they have to get through his scandal-riddled police force.

2. "Make the lie big, make it simple, keep saying it, and eventually they will believe it."
Answer: Sorry, this isn't Mayor Mike explaining why no Wall Street executives have been prosecuted for the massive fraud that caused the ongoing economic meltdown. This is Adolf Hitler, outlining a political game plan that has since become a favorite of American politicians from coast to coast.

3."What goes on in Europe concerns us greatly."
Answer: This isn't Hitler trying to trump up an excuse to invade Czechoslovakia. It's Mayor Mike trumping up an excuse for his minions to roam the world unchecked.

4."It's my job to stand up and support companies…"
Answer: Not Adolph backing the German industrial war effort. It's Mayor Mike supporting his buddies in Goldman Sachs, after a New York Times op-ed piece blew the whistle on the firm's current fraudulent activities. Lost in the shuffle was the fact that no regulatory or law enforcement authorities followed up to investigate the serious allegations contained in the article.

5. "Industry, technology, and commerce can thrive only as long as [the] community offers the necessary preconditions."
Answer: Not Mayor Mike this time, it's Hitler. Amazing how great minds think alike.

6. "These endless legal challenges that define elections... are a joke."
Answer: This isn't Hitler about to torch liberty in prewar Germany. It's Mayor Mike, doing an end around not-one-but-two voter referendums that would have denied him a third term as mayor. Sure, the people have spoken, but sometimes democracy is hard of hearing.

Hope everyone did well with their answers because Mayor Mike's final term as mayor expires at the end of 2013, and his reign as Führer begins.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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