Written by Flexicon
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Tuesday, 29 November 2011

Please join me each day as I reveal the words and phrases guaranteed to keep you single for a whole year. Sourced directly from the world's finest internet dating profiles, Your Daily Flexicon is the essential guide for the online dater, or indeed anyone who has a thing for typos, malapropisms and plane baad speling.

This entry sticks in my mind for two reasons - it was in the very first profile I looked at when I decided to try online dating, and I think you'll agree it has a certain chilling resonance:

"I like cooking cars girls and motorbikes"

I don't care how pressed for time you are, never underestimate the importance of a comma. This profile wasn't up for very long. Maybe the author met the plucky girl of his gastronomic dreams. More likely, he's currently "helping police with their enquiries."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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