Written by Charpa93
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Tuesday, 22 November 2011

image for How Grover Norquist Stole Christmas

Now the middle of classes were middler than most
They had oodles of things on which they could boast.
They had cars, and houses, and TVs and more
They were boasting and boasting of goodies galore.

Til one day the bottom all dropped out from under
The middle of classes was torn quite asunder.
The greed of the 1% people with money
Decided to steal all the milk and the honey.

There'd be no Christmas at least for the middle
Their savings had dried up to less than a piddle.
No tea set for Susie, no train set for Bill,
No help for their parents from Capitol Hill.

A man with a tax plan who called himself Grover
Determined the American Dream was now over.
From now on he'd fight for only the wealthy
The richest of rich and the healthiest of healthy.

No tax for the millionaires claimed Grover's pledge
We'll push all the Middlers straight up to the edge.
I promise you, promise you, promise you all
If you sign on the line, working people will fall.

They'll all lose their jobs, they'll go hungry and then
If they dare try to make it, we'll push them again.
Their paydays will dwindle, they'll beg for our mercy
Especially the ones who were born in New Jersey.

Wisconsans, Ohioans all wanting to bargain
We'll teach them new words in our greediness jargon.
Down with new taxes and up with bank fees
We'll squeeze and we'll squeeze and we'll squeeze till they wheeze.

And then Grover laughed, yes he laughed till he cried
He looked in the camera with a face full of snide.
I told you I'd do it, I told you I could
Put all of those lawmakers up to no good.

This Christmas will only be happy for some
The very tip tippy top tippy top ones.
He finished his tirade with one last remark
Get rid of those hippies in Zucotti Park.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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