Written by Lyndon
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Thursday, 1 September 2011

image for Costner rushes production team to flooded-out Vermont to film prequel to Waterworld
Costner surveys Harfold in search of the perfect place for his director's chair

HARFOLD, Vermont--Rumors at Harold Fish & Chips have been confirmed--residents have, indeed, spied actor and producer Kevin Costner snooping around areas in and around Harfold where the worst of Irene's flooding can be found.

A spokesperson for Costner confirmed Wednesday, "Mr. Costner has long pondered a prequel to Waterworld but has never wanted to front the money he needed to create his sets some 15 years ago. Although many will see this as someone taking advantage of a state of emergency, it is, after all, in the name of art."

Although the plot outline is still being hammered out for Waterworld: The Beginning, Costner will play the grandfather to the little boy who will become "The Mariner," Costner's character in the 1995 non-classic.

Grandfather Costner has played his entire 24-year baseball career with the Seattle Mariners but has never made it to the postseason. However, Costner's Mariners team now finds itself 18 games in first place as a devastating hurricanes hit the West Coast. Determined to play out the season, the Mariners travel by cars, bus, and train to White River Junction, Vermont, where it is believed a baseball field still exists above ground.

Additional seating will be added to Harfold State College's Davis Field to increase its current seating from 75 seats to 5,000.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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