HOLLYWOOD - The housewives of Wisteria Lane will become even more desperate as they enter the final season of the hit show Desperate Housewives.
The shows producer Marc Cherry said that he does not want to give away too much of the upcoming season but he did say that the character of Gabrielle Solis played by Eva Longoria will divorce Carlos (Richard Chavira) and become engaged to 85-year-old Playboy mogul Hugh Hefner.
She unlike the flaky blonde bitch Crystal Harris who backed out of marrying Hef a mere four days before the wedding will most definitely go through with the wedding.
Felicity Huffman who portrays Lynette Scavo will divorce her husband Tom (Doug Savant) and begin a tempestuous lesbian relationship with Rosie O'Donnell.
The rest of the cast including Susan Mayer (Teri Hatcher) and Bree Van De Kamp (Marcia Cross) will then be captured by space aliens kind of like the ones that appeared in the movie Cowboys & Aliens. They will all be taken to a far away intergalactic planet that looks a lot like Saturn but smells more like Uranus.
There the women will be bred with alien studs and everyone will be happy and sit around a campfire on the musical planet known as Funktune roasting marshmallows and singing songs written by Kara DioGuardi, Neil Sedaka, Shania Twain, and Glenn Beck.
Marc Cherry the shows producer was asked if he would be considering having a spin-off of the popular series. He grinned, took a sip of his Shirley Temple and said "No way Jose, I have learned my effen lesson and I will never again work with the freakin likes of self-absorbed, demanding, spoiled bitches again."
In a related story. Cherry is currently finalizing the plans for a new television pilot that will star Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton, Samantha Ronson, and Naomi Campbell which is titled, The Real Bitches of Rodeo Drive.