Victoria and David Beckham, or Dumb and Dumber as they have become affectionately referred to, have announced the safe arrival of their new baby daughter.
Maris Piper Kleenex George Formby P60 Drainage Meninges Have I got News for You Beckham was born at 7.55, or, according to Mr Beckham, "when the little hand was near the '8' and the big hand at the '11' innit".
David Beckham was also said to be delighted.
He knew his wife was pregnant, but didn't know what it might be and was reported to be thrilled that it was a child. He had been maintaining a vigil at the bedside for most of the night until his eldest son, Dabitoff Housemoving Transformer, suggested it might be more comforting for Victoria if he actually went down to the hospital to be with his wife instead.