DUBLIN - Two weeks ago George Clooney dumped his girlfriend of two years Elisabetta Canalis.
And just recently he was spotted in Dublin's Sons of Killarney Diner engaged in an intimate, playful, embrace with Sandra Bullock which included tongue wrestling or uvula diving as they refer to it in the Reno-Lake Tahoe area.
Sandra aka "The Kissing Bandit" explained to a reporter for Dublin's Daily Gubbeen Gazette that she was merely providing a heartbroken Clooney with a shoulder to lean on.
When asked if her shoulder was connected to her throat she started laughing uncontrollably.
She pointed out that she also provided him with that same shoulder later on that evening at The Happy Harmonious Hedgehog Restaurant. Sandra blushed and said that she had no idea that Georgie was taking it so darn hard.
Ms. Bullock who happens to be 46, was informed that Mr. Clooney who is 50, has never dated a woman who was less than 15 years younger than him.
An irritated Bullock fired back by saying that she had left her birth certificate back at her home in Austin and that she did not give a woodchuck's butt about anyone's age and especially not her own.
When Clooney was asked if things between him and Bullock were getting serious he smiled, took a puff of his Montecristo Cigar, and a sip of his Samuel Adams Irish Red Beer and asked that it all depends on what his definition of serious is.
The reporter for The Daily Gubbeen Gazette rolled his eyes and said will lets say third base shall we?
Clooney laughed and said that he had only gotten to second base with a stand up double.
Bullock got extremely embarrassed and turned as red as a Sheboygan strawberry. Clooney smiled, grabbed at his groin region, and softly started singing a Beatles song; "Norwegian Wood" I believe it was.
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