Written by matthatt
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Tuesday, 21 June 2011

image for Coldplay's Chris Martin Booked Beyonce For Glastonbury, Gwyneth furious!
Chris Martin warming his fingers up to play with his wife.

Coldplay frontman Chris Martin is hiding down the pub since incurring the wrath of her indoors.

Apparently the lovely Gwyneth, no honest, she is lovely, it's not her fault that she was named after a sheep, anyhoo, the lovely Gwyneth is in one heck of grumpuss, all folded arms and bottom lip sticking out, since Mr Paltrow went and booked another bird for Glasto and didn't even give his Mrs a look-in.

'Beyonce?' Said Mrs Martin sulkily, 'What's she got that I don't?' she asked the assembled reporters who were camped out on the doorstep of the Beverly Hills Yurt shared by the couple and their children probably, a few hands went up but were quickly slapped down by other nearby reporters.

'I made a song too' continued the Hollywood actress turned singer, 'They even played it on VH1'

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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