Runaway bride, Crystal Harris, who almost got hitched to Hugh Hefner - 60 years her senior - is to appear on the Dr Phil show dressed up as Daffy Duck in a heartfelt bid to put a stop to certain circulating salacious rumours, and to prove that she is as interesting covered up as she is uncovered.
The move was masterminded by Hollywood publicist Walt Kevorkian, who is reported to be fanatical about establishing Crystal's intellectual credentials, even if it means downgrading her more obvious assets.
The logic behind Crystal's appearance in a Daffy Duck suit is said to be a veiled reference to the cartoon like qualities of certain celebrities, and aims to demonstrate that beneath such banal exteriors, quite frequently, brilliant, razor-sharp minds are constantly at work.
During the course of the interview, Crystal will talk about the sheer hell that is frequently the lot of glamor models - the long hours, the endless waiting, the strain on the lips of extended bouts of pouting like a fish, and the heavy toll that high heels have on the feet of the beautiful people.
"I just want people to know that I'm human," Crystal told a friend. "Which is why I'll be dressed up like Daffy Duck. And I want to be perceived as a role model for the kids. Then I'll maybe lie down by the pool for a while and study the clouds."
More as we get it.