Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Tuesday, 14 June 2011

image for Kathy Griffin Explains Why She Gave Brad Pitt and George Clooney Each A Sexy Lap Dance
Kathy Griffin literally had Brad Pitt and George Clooney in the palm of her hand with her lap dance.

NEW ORLEANS - The star of My Life On The D-List at first denied sexy lap dance allegations made by a security guard and a custodian at The Giggle Giggle Comedy Club on Bourbon Street.

The comedy club is co-owned by Harry Connick Jr., and Ellen DeGeneres and has featured such well known stand up comedians as Chris Rock, Jimmy Fallon, Condoleezza Rice, and Jeff Foxworthy.

According to Margarita Mixx of The Tinsel Town Times Tribune, a few days ago Kathy Griffin was the featured performer and Brad Pitt and George Clooney were in the audience.

Griffin made a joke about Angelina Jolie's collagen-injected lips and Brad hollered out that Griffin was a red-headed bitch.

She then made a joke about Elisabetta Canalis' humongous tongue and George yelled out that Griffin was an old freckle-faced slut.

Griffin was so taken aback by the remarks of both Pitt and Clooney that she actually cut her comedy routine short. She left the stage and sent word to both men that she would like to talk with them backstage in her dressing room.

Kathy had figured out a way to get back into the good graces of Brad Pitt and George Clooney.

When Brad and George knocked on her door, Kathy hollered out for them to come in. As they entered her room they noticed that she was wearing a skimpy, white, string bikini swimsuit that barely covered everything that her mama had given her.

Griffin told them each to sit down in the two chairs that she had placed side by side. Both eagerly complied with her instructions. She then turned on her CD player and the song "Black Velvet" by Alannah Myles started playing.

Kathy started gyrating to the erotic beat of the song. George's eyes lit up as Griffin stood in front of him and backed up towards him. Meanwhile Brad was getting into it as he began chanting, "Go Kathy! Go Kathy!"

George's face was now as red as a Savannah strawberry. After making lap contact Kathy quickly turned her attention towards Brad. And now it was his turn to enjoy the sensuous gyrations of the red-headed dancing queen.

And instantly Pitt's face turned red, and his was even redder than Clooney's. Brad's red coloring was more like that of a Santa Barbara strawberry.

After having a few drinks. Brad Pitt and George Clooney both left Kathy Griffin's dressing room.

A comedy club security guard, who happened to see them leave Ms. Griffin's dressing room, remarked that both Pitt and Clooney were smiling and both looked as happy as two woodpeckers in a wooden yardstick factory.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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