Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Tuesday, 31 May 2011

image for LeAnn Rimes Explains Her Anorexic Look
LeAnn Rimes says that she has lost her weight on 'The 7 M&Ms Per Day Diet.'

CABO SAN LUCAS, Mexico - LeAnn Rimes recently stated that she no longer finds it amusing to be known as a 'husband-stealer.'

The singer of such song hits as "Blue," "Unchained Melody," "Blue Denim Britches," "Swingin" and the follow up "Swingin With Some Other Woman's Hubby" was spotted at Cabo's The Whole Enchilada Hotel and Spa wearing a bikini swimsuit that many wondered how in the world it manged to stay on.

One hotel employee identified as Manolo Bingo told Polo Del Matador of The Cabo San Lucas Morning Olé News that Lee N. Rims, as she is known in Mexico looked like she had not eaten anything in two weeks.

Bingo reportedly told Del Matador, "Dat Lee N. Rims chee has no butt, eat ease gone like dat beach Sarah Playpen's presidential hoops (hopes)."

LeAnn Rimes did get to speak to Mr. Del Matador and she informed him that yes it is true she has lost lots of weight even to the point of looking anorexic but she said that she lost all of that weight for a very damn good reason.

When asked to explain, Rimes took a sip of her diet water and said that the reason why she has gotten down to 78 pounds is because she is so afraid that her new husband Eddie Cibrian will leave her if she becomes overweight.

She went on to say that since she is getting older, it will definitely become harder and harder for her to steal other women's husbands so she is going to do her best to stay latched on to this one.

She pointed out that on several occasions Eddie made it very clear to her that if she ever got to looking like Wynonna Judd, Carnie Wilson, or Oprah Winfrey that he would dump her ass quicker than she could say the word 'yodel.'

The Cabo San Lucas Morning Olé News will bring you any further developments on the story as they come up through their American sister publication The Cucamonga Chit Chat Chronicle.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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