Written by Jalapenoman
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Topics: Award, Eating

Tuesday, 8 November 2005

image for Kate Hudson Sues Tabloids for Anorexia Accusations
Actress Kate Hudson is upset by accusations that she is anorexic.

Actress Kate Hudson, daughter of Goldie Hawn, has sued several tabloids due to their all running pictures of the actress that show her as having an eating disorder. The young actress was nominated for an Academy Award for her work in Almost Famous. Her newest release is the film Skeleton Key (she assured us that the title had nothing to do with her current weight or figure).

The magazines in question printed photos showing a skinny Hudson and insinuated that she had anorexia nervosa, an eating disorder. "I am not anorexic!," said Hudson. "Sure, I've lost a lot of weight in the recent past, but the biggest part of that was my baby and the baby fat."

Kate joins a long list of actresses who have been accused of having eating disorders. This year has already seen reports in the media of Lindsay Lohan, one of the Olsen twins (who cares which), and Kiera Knightly suffering from anorexia.

The actress said last evening in a live television interview that, "If people think I'm anorexic, they'll get turned off and not want to watch my nude scenes or pick up magazines where I wear see-thru clothing. My mom got famous dancing in teeny bikinis on Laugh In and running around for a whole movie in just bra and white panties in "Butterflies Are Free." She exposed a breast in "Best Friends" with Burt Reynolds and showed off her behind in "Overboard" with my stepfather (Kurt Russell). If I want to be the same caliber of star today, I've got to show a little more skin and have a little more action. I'm trying, but don't know if I've gone far enough yet."

The Spoof contasted Blockbuster Video early this morning and discovered that they had no video tapes or DVDs available of "Butterflies Are Free," "Best Friends," or "Overboard." Store manager Jeff Stilson said that, "for some reason, a whole bunch of people ran in last night and all wanted to rent or buy that movie. They also wanted to know if any of the Laugh In seasons were available, and I'm out of those now too. I guess people just want to see Goldie Hawn movies right now."

When asked if any other actors had films that were all rented or sold out, the Manager replied that, "Well, the old perverts and the young girls always want rent Olsen Twins movies, so it's hard to keep them in stock. We're also having a run on Kate Hudson movies, though everyone keeps asking how much skin she shows in them. I guess she did some kind of interview last night."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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