Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Monday, 30 May 2011

image for Dallas Cowboys Quarterback Tony Romo Has Just Scored An Off-Season Touchdown By Marrying The Beautiful Candice Crawford
Jessica Simpson's text message to Tony Romo on his marriage was not very nice. (Photo courtesy of Tony Romo).

ARLINGTON, Texas - April saw the Royal Wedding take place in London, England between Prince William and Kate Middleton.

And now May has seen the Cowboy Wedding take place in Arlington, Texas between Tony Romo and Candice Crawford.

Romo, of the Dallas Cowboys married his girlfriend of two years Dallas television anchor woman Candice Crawford in a very nice down-home Texas style sports wedding.

Tony looked nice dressed in his Cowboy uniform complete with helmet and cleats and Candice looked totally stunning dressed as one of the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders.

Cowboy legends from the past who were present at the Lone Star state wedding were Troy Aikman (#8), Roger Staubach (#12), and Efren Herrera (#1).

Modern day Cowboys who were present included Miles "Playboy" Austin (#19), Jason "Cabo San Lucas" Witten (#82), Keith "Crazy Cowboy" Brooking (#51), and Igor "The Monster" Olshansky (#99).

Eight of the high-kicking Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders served as bridesmaids including Erica Beth Sue Dimdiddle, 21, who had been rumored to have been involved in a relationship with the former governor of California Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Those rumors were dispelled when it was proven that Miss Dimdiddle does not like men with accents and especially a tremendously strong accent like the one Schwarzenegger possesses.

Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry Jones paid for the entire shindig and had it filmed and he, being ever the businessman, pointed out that he will be selling the DVDs of the happy event at the souvenir shops located throughout Cowboy Stadium as well as through his Internet site.

Bedroom Pillow Talk reported that two of Tony Romo's ex-girlfriends who were both dumped by Tony each sent him text messages.

Carrie Underwood texted him saying that she wished him well and hopes that he fumbles a lot during the coming season.

Jessica Simpson was not quite as nice. She texted him saying that she hopes that he gets stung by a crazed swarm of Texas yellow jacket bees in his crotch region during a nationally televised game.

Advance copies of the Tony Romo-Candice Crawford wedding and wedding reception DVD can be pre-ordered by interested parties by going to www.itsallaboutjerryjones.yup

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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