Written by Bert Onassis
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Thursday, 26 May 2011

Cheryl Fergison, who plays Eastender's Heather Trott has married her Moroccan toyboy in a secret ceremony in the country.

Neighbours say that Heather is fitting in really well, but that the goat population suffers fantastic losses each time she arrives.

"We like her very much and are making a Tagine for her. We have borrowed a digger from the local harbour construction site to dig the clay. We haven't a kiln big enough so will be using the State Brick Factory's oven to fire the tagine. When it is finished, we will have a big party and cook her with raisins and couscous. Lovely."

Cheryl has offered to move to Morrocco, but the King intervened and refused her a residency permit stating Morroccoo was on an unsteady fault line and that the risks were too high.

"The International Seizmic Survey" has stated that they don't think there is a fault under Morrooccoo, but that one could be bought from the US Government from their factory partnered with The Bern group, a member of the CERN ATLAS experiment at the Large Hadron Collider

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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