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Thursday, 26 May 2011

image for Illinois Flood Warning As Oprah Bows Out

The Federal Emergency Management Agency has issued a flood alert for Chicago and most of Illinois state in the wake of the final Oprah Winfrey chat show on Wednesday.

FEMA Director William Fugate issued the warning after a massive outpouring of grief triggered an unprecedented flood of tears that threatens to engulf the whole state.

The authorities were alerted to the potential of an environmental disaster just minutes into the show when widespread clapping and cheering created earth tremors in downtown Chicago equivalent to 3.2 on the Richter scale.

As the show progressed and reached its climax the city's flood defences came under increasing pressure as increasing rivers of water escaped from the TV studio and flowed through the streets towards Lake Michigan.

At approximately 21.00 hours midwest time the show ended and the city's defences were finally breached.

Fugate went on : "We have major concerns that the flooding will spread to most other parts of the US as reruns of the syndicated show are producing similar incidents of mass hysteria all across the land.

"The only chance of the flooding abating would be if Miss Winfrey announced that the show is to get another series".

Its understood that President Obama interrupted the main course of his meal with the Queen at the American Embassy to plead with Oprah to think again.

The destiny of the most powerful nation in the world is now in her hands.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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