Written by P.M. Wortham
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this
Topics: Armageddon, WWE, WWF, macho

Sunday, 22 May 2011

image for Judgment Day Claims One of God's Messengers, Macho Man Randy Savage
One of the Macho Man's Hybrid vehicles. Hybrid=(Commuter Vehicle + Ability to Crush Things)

While many non believers poked fun at Reverend Camping and his followers for predicting May 21, 2011 to be Judgment Day, others are confident that he was not completely wrong. One devoted group of fans calling themselves "BOMMRS", or Believers of Macho Man Randy Savage, say that he was indeed called to a better place on the ominous day.

The consummate entertainer in a profession that requires mental and physical discipline, the pure of heart and dedicated character to his fans, Macho Man had a flair for bravado and color. Always staying in character, he once drove his F350 truck with oversized tires over the top of a Prius at a stop sign, because the driver was too busy texting to pay attention to the road. "Oooh, yeah. I've got a little message for ya", he was heard to say on his way through the intersection.

There were few sports entertainment figures who could pull off a fashion statement that included yellow spotted parachute pants, a shredded red muscle tee shirt, and a Harley Davidson bandanna. Macho Man Randy Savage was such a man. Whether on a trip to the sporting goods store to pick up more free weights, or to the health foods store for more protein powder, fans could always count on the Macho Man for an "In character" appearance.

"I remember seeing him once at a Chinese Carry Out restaurant", said Melvin Meekman, lifelong BOMMRS member. "They had forgotten to pack the hot mustard sauce with his egg rolls to-go, and the Macho Man body slammed the owner over the counter. In the end the owner got the best of the deal with an autographed photo of Savage and a dedication that read, 'Best Damn Egg Rolls in the City'. The Macho Man was philanthropic like that. A real people person".

Reverend Camping and the few that remain as his followers, were not quick to recognize that Savage had been called home on Judgment Day when so many others, specifically themselves, were not. "He was just a fake wrestler. He was clearly NOT worthy", said Camping follower, Tilda Blockidge-Paszez.

"I disagree", says Meekman. "The Macho Man did more to bring people joy and fulfillment, and had a lot more credibility that Camping dude. He will always be remembered. Oooh Yeah!"

Make P.M. Wortham's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 2 plus 1?

2 3 9 19
64 readers are online right now!

Go to top