Written by anthonyrosania
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Saturday, 21 May 2011

image for Playboy Magazine At 57: Can People Still Beat Off To It?

For those of us who found a brace of semi-moist Playboy magazines inexplicably stashed in the woods near their home -- and spontaneously gummed up their Underoos with Tween-Jizz before they got home, looking at at Playboy magazine in its 57th year of publication might be a bit unsatisfying.

"It's so tame," writes a former fan on the 'Playboy Wanksters' blog, "I couldn't beat off to this if Selma Hayek held the magazine open with her asscheeks."

Indeed, the same Playboy who made boobie-shots available -even acceptable- for the general public has become a bit staid in it's senior years.

"No self-caressing, no little brown balloon-knot, not one shot of a model pulling apart her lips so that it looks like an open-faced roast beef sandwich?" said the blogger. "Why would I buy this if I can befoul my keyboard with man-jelly in 5 minutes on Youporn?"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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