Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Monday, 16 May 2011

image for Celebrity Apprentice: Donald Trump Fires Lil Jon and Meat Loaf
Meat Loaf without his toupee leaving the Trump Towers Building after being fired by Donald Trump.

NEW YORK CITY - In the latest edition of Celebrity Apprentice, Donald Trump took the remaining four contestants and quickly fired half of them.

Hip hop rap singer Lil Jon, who has dreadlocks that go down to his knees, was told by the "Donald" that there were two reasons why he was being fired.

He said that the first was because he appeared to be listless and tired all of the time. The second reason that the "Trumpster" gave was simply that he does not care for hip hop or rap music.

Trump said that it's nothing personal but that he just does not like listening to music that he cannot dance to. Lil Jon told him that he can dance to his music.

Donald told him that if he tried to dance to hip hop or rap music he would most certainly pull a muscles or muscles somewhere on his body simply because he is an old white guy and old white guys don't do hip hop dancing.

Lil Jon shook his head and nearly knocked his teammate country crooner John Rich right off his chair when he hit him with about 25 pounds of hair.

Trump then turned his silly looking hairdo towards Meat Loaf. Trump chuckled as he said that he has never known a man who cries more than Meat Loaf does.

Meat Loaf immediately told him that the weeper of the house John Boehner cries more than him. Trump replied by saying Bullsh*t.

The singer then said that Brett Favre cries way more than him and again Trump replied with the same two words.

"Glenn Beck?"

And Trump said that although Becky is in fact way up there in the crybaby department he stressed that Meat Loaf cries much too much.

He said that one day, his cleaning service told him that they had found 13 empty Kleenex boxes stashed behind the sofa of his (Meat Loaf's) dressing room.

Donald did tell both gentlemen that he was going to pay for Lil Jon to have his silly looking dreadlocks cut off and that he was going to send Meat Loaf to a tear specialist up in Boston.

And so that now leaves John "The Black Hat" Rich and Marlee "Happy Face" Matlin left to see who will be this year's Celebrity Apprentice.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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