Written by Lady Godiva
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Saturday, 14 May 2011

image for Party Planner Pippa Middleton called upon to plan celebration 'do' for Queens Park Rangers-they've requested a cake in the shape of her 'bum'
QPR players and Pippa to party together

Phillipa (Pippa) Middleton was the obvious choice of Queens Park Rangers to plan the upcoming celebration 'do' for the team as they move back into the English Premier League.

Although a little hesitant when first approached, Pippa agreed and says it will be one of the most unusual parties she has planned.

She has been, and continues to be very successful in the 'business' she runs with her mother' Their business is well known by members of the upper-class party going crowd.

"I know we will have to do a lot of 'outsourcing' for this particular party," Pippa told this reporter.

"The boys want lap dancers and I have not a clue where to begin looking for such dancers. I found the name and number of a Soho Party planner 'Sex Is Us:We'll give you what you want'.

I have arranged to meet with the owner 'Bunny Beaver' and we are going to over some ideas and prices.

A local publican is going to advise me on 'drinks' for the party and he mentioned something about kegs and plastic tumblers.

I asked why plastic and he told me the players may get a little over-excited after 10 -15 beers but he has promised to organize for paramedics to be in attendance.

Honestly, the more I go into the planning, the more nervous I begin feel.

However, I have never once let a customer down, so I will definitely try to give the 'lads' what they want.

They have asked for a cake to be made in the shape of my bottom. I tried not to blush and promised them I'd deliver. I'm just a little nervous about approaching my Cake Boss to make the mould.

I did draw the line at having place mats made with a nude photo of me in the top left hand corner. I thought that would be a little tacky.

I have been warned in advance that the tables should be extra strong, not like the tables I usually use at my parties. When I asked why I was told that by the end of the night, the majority of players will be dancing naked on these tables.

This party, if all goes well, could bring us a whole knew type of clientèle."

You said it Pippa. Good luck!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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