Pippa Middleton, the younger sister of new Princess Kate Middleton, has announced her engagement to American Bargis Tryhol, Pippa became an international celebrity yesterday when her ass was the most photographed thing at Great Britain's most recent Royal Wedding. Bargis is a Florida resident and most famous as the Guiness Book record holder as the man with the world's largest penis.
Bargis and Pippa have apparently been living together in a condo on the south of France for the last month. Both have admitted enjoying the nearby nude beach as each can let their most famous assets "hang out for the whole world to see."
Pippa was seen leaving the wedding festivities with Tryhol as they headed to Dover to board his private yacht, The Buggerall. The Captain and First Mate of his ship, the cojoined Pissgums twins, said that "it's a real pleasure to have Miss Middleton on board. She's such a beauty that she keeps everyone here standing at attention all day long."
The Pissgums also said that the happy couple was introduced by a joint friend, a man named Fernando Monte Verde (who has been called The Most Interesting Man In The World).
When asked how he felt about Pippa, he said that "the whole world may have fallen in love with her back end yesterday, but her front end, both north and south, are equally as enjoyable."
Pippa and Bargis have not yet announced a date for their upcoming nuptuals. "We're just enjoying each other's bodies in as many hot, sweaty, and gyrating ways that we can while we are both still young and agile. The hot monkey sex won't last forever, so we'll get it on while we can."
Kate Middleton is supposedly jealous of her sister, as she is reported to have told a friend "she's got the man with the world's biggest penis, and I have to put up with Prince Willie's little willie! Maybe my future brother in law can throw me a bone now and then