Written by Reddon
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Tuesday, 26 April 2011

image for "It's Gwyneth Paltrow Who's The C**t Here" Says 76 Year Old Gran
Jean Vincent Up The Shops Yesterday.

76 year old grandmother of eight, Jean Vincent, of Hapton near Burnley in the UK reacted angrily to Gwyneth Paltrow's outrageous dropping of the 'C' word on Chelsea Handler's US TV show.

Paltrow, feebly attempting to be risque and 'out there' dropped the bomb when Chelsea referred to her own grandmother as "a real bitch."

Gwyneth responded: "Mine was a right c**t."

In a sort of faux Liam Gallagher Manchester accent.

Which prompted Jean Vincent to almost choke on her Alpen breakfast this morning as she perused the Daily Mail. Mrs Vincent, described as "sweet" by neighbours, was prompted to take out her new laptop and bash out a frenzied response in the 'comments' section of the Mail's online spoof website.

"It's outrageous that this young woman should come out and call her own Gran a c**t on a national TV show. The way I see it, it isn't so much her Gran who was a right c**t as Gwyneth Paltrow - who is a right proper sweaty, haddocky c**t. And that Chelsea Handler - she's a drippy c**t for allowing Paltrow to call her Gran a c**t on the telly box. And the editors at the Daily Mail are a right shower of c**ts too for running a story with the word c**t in it. C**ts, the lot of 'em. Did I say that I nearly choked on me Alpen as I read that? Alpen, yes...nearly choked on it I did. C**ts."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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