Written by Mr Goster
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Wednesday, 20 April 2011

image for Girls Aloud Back Without Cheryl
Girls Aloud

Girls Aloud have confirmed they are ready to record their next album without Cheryl Cole.

The four less famous members, Sarah Harding, Kimberley Walsh, Nadine Coyle and the other one have admitted they can't wait around forever to see whether Cheryl can be bothered or not.

A band insider said, 'The Girls are desperately keen to start recording again, especially after Nadine's disastrous solo stuff bombed last year. They've realised now they haven't got any real talent as individuals and can't look a gift horse in the mouth any more.

They are also contracted to release 3 more albums and next year is their 10th Anniversary so they are going to be busy girls. Cheryl is the best looking, and she will be missed but it's now up to the others to step up to the plate.

The Girls know they can't keep trawling out the same old shite forever and have even been learning new instruments. Sarah has been learning the Recorder and Kimberley can already play the Triangle fluently, so doubters who don't think that Girls Aloud are a proper band had better watch out.'

In other news, Girls Aloud manager Louis Walsh has today confirmed he is not Kimberley Walsh's Father.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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