As Superstar Lady Ga Ga releases her brand new album she revealed some astonishing secrets which are sure to create the wave of publicity that is so important to album sales.
Lady Ga Ga, real name Maureen Milligan, was in fine form as she chatted and explained what the new album is all about.
'The album's called ''Marry The Night'' and is all about my confession to my fans that I've totally hoodwinked them for ages now. I'm not this little sqeaky clean dorky girl with no friends, I'm a multi millionaire who could buy and sell most of my fans. Surely no-one bought the whole Virgin concept! Do I look like a virgin?
It's like an addiction this record, probably like Heroin, or Night Nurse, or whatever, y'know. I will do absolutely anything to make money. I'd even duet with SuBo if it was good for business.
My agent, Houston Texas was right. Pretend you are nice at the start, and once the money rolls in, F**k 'em!
It's all in the name of entertainment of course, I love my fans really I do. The album's out on Monday in all good record stores. Please donate, I mean, buy generously and make me even more money.'