CABO SAN LUCAS, Mexico - Lady Gaga flew down to Mexico to get away from the maddening crowd of El Lay as well as to ease her mind regarding her recent highly publicized feud with Beyonce and the lawsuit filed against her by The Lady Gaga Day Care Center of Hackensack, New Jersey on grounds of name infringement.
Regarding her feud with Beyonce, 29, it apparently started when Beyonce remarked that Lady Gaga had a very strange name. She said that it sounded like something that a baby would say.
Lady Gaga, 24, fired back by saying that Beyonce's booty was so gigantically humongous that if it were brains she would be a German rocked scientist.
In regards to the lawsuit, Lady Gaga said that things are looking good but she said that she did not want to go into detail about it because it makes her break out in hives and then she has to use about two jars of Revlon makeup to cover them up.
When Lady Gaga arrived in Cabo, she immediately checked into the exquisite Pancho Villa Resort Villa under the assumed name Empanada Chicharrones, 24, and within twenty minutes she was down on the beautiful snow white beach.
Pancho Villa Resort Villa employee Pablo P. Picadillo, 27, said that Lady Gagagitas was wearing a little, itty, bitty, magenta-colored, one-piece swimsuit that looked like it had come out of a postage stamp machine.
Lady Ga had recently taken surfing lessons up in Venice Beach from Toby Cody Floozybrew, who is regarded as one of the best surfers in the world and who has dated such well known celebrities as Britney Spears, Jessica Simpson, Halle Berry, and Betty White (on a dare).
Picadillo said that he watched LG for 45 minutes since he was on his lunch hour. He said that she managed to catch three pretty good size waves.
And then he said that she suddenly got hit by a huge wave that hit her so hard that it literally knocked her little, itty, bitty, magenta-colored, one-piece swimsuit completely off but Lady G. being the surfing trooper that she is kept on smiling and surfing in the buff to the thunderous applause of over 72 beach goers.
A little six-year-old local boy jumped into the water and was able to retrieve the swimsuit before the sharks took it out to sea. Lady Gaga was so thrilled she rewarded him with a Coke Zero, an order of Macho Nachos, an autographed 8 by 10 glossy of herself, her latest CD, and a check for $3,000.
In other news. Sarah Palin has stated that the rumor that nine-year-old daughter Piper got expelled from grade school for shooting a wayward beaver on the school grounds with a B B gun are totally false. "Crosshairs" Palin said that Piper told her that the beaver had fallen over from frostbite.