Written by Gail Farrelly
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Saturday, 2 April 2011

image for Snooki Advises Toni Morrison to Get a Pouf
Will Snooki or Toni impress them more?

Don't count Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi, "The Jersey Shore" star, among those who were shocked to learn that she was paid $32,000 for her talk at Rutgers University, while famous author Toni Morrison is being paid only $30,000 to give the Rutgers commencement address.

"Morrison is so yesterday," the pint-sized star has told friends. "I mean that hair, puh-lease. Can't she go to a hairdresser and add a little pouf or something?"

As for Morrison's writing, Snooki doesn't give a hoot about the Nobel prize, saying "If I were Morrison, I wouldn't advertise the fact that I had impressed a bunch of old Swedes. Girl, that's not such a great selling point!"

But what about the fact that Morrison's novel Beloved won a Pulitzer? "I don't give a pig's patootie," proclaimed Snooki. "Besides, Joseph Pulitzer's been dead for almost a hundred years. Who cares what he thinks?"

In fact, Snooki is totally confident that her own novel, A Shore Thing, released this year, is a sure thing to win numerous awards for excellence. "A $32,000 speaking fee will then be small potatoes," she said. "Let Morrison put that in her pipe and smoke it."

Make Gail Farrelly's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 4 multiplied by 3?

8 12 21 20
54 readers are online right now!

Go to top